Self-esteem is a word composed of the words self and esteem. Auto means a compositional element that enters the formation of some Spanish voices with the meaning of “own or by oneself”. Esteem, is the consideration and appreciation that is made of a person for its quality and circumstance. We can say, then, that self-esteem is the consideration and appreciation that is made of our person, by ourselves.
The level of our self-esteem is broadly related to our state of mind, the situations in which we are involved and the degree of satisfaction we have regarding our achievements and behavior. Usually when we say that we have normal self-esteem, it is rather because we have high self-esteem, and actually we feel comfortable with ourselves.
However, it is not good to get to extremes, because we tend to confuse high self-esteem with self-centeredness and narcissism, the opposite extreme is low self-esteem, this can be very dangerous, because by losing esteem for our own being, we also we lose our respect and we do not care what happens to us. People who are frequently subjected to stress, disbelief, discouragement, humiliation and difficulties, if they do not know how to face and overcome these situations, can have serious self-esteem problems.
It is, then, like a mountain, we can stay lost in the valley or climb to the top. The title is “raise self-esteem” our goal is to overcome the level of self-esteem we have today and raise our self-esteem, never descending downhill to the bottom, but get out of the bottom and reach the top on a road lit by the sun , the moon and the stars; looking for the elimination of adversities and valuing ourselves, in terms of consideration and appreciation.
Remember those letters that we wrote when there was no telephone, which began saying: Sir …, of my highest consideration and appreciation … What was this? It was, nothing more and nothing less than, a sign of the esteem that we had for that person. Now that we have a telephone and almost do not write, let us tell ourselves that we are of the highest consideration and esteem. It’s not bad, it’s good, if it’s not perfect.
It is said of politics, which is the art of the possible as long as there is trust and credibility, well, in self-esteem there must be trust and credibility but in ourselves. Confidence that we are capable of approaching life and its circumstances in positive conditions, with faith and hope to overcome difficulties and how negative it may be; and credibility that we can do things and understand them.
If we do not have confidence and credibility in ourselves we are lost and urgently need to raise our self-esteem. When we lack these qualities we fall into the aberration of looking for scapegoats for our actions and we are able to point people out and enter the courtyard of the lawsuits with those people, making them guilty of our negligence and recklessness, of the breach we make of the laws of the universe, and of our incompetence, which seems unfair from the vantage point, because we are shooting the arrow where it does not have to go, but this is the product of our low self-esteem, which sees enemies where there is none and wants to harvest where he has not sown.
Self-esteem consists of not allowing our internal moral and spiritual support to weaken, so as not to fall into the degradation of the body and be victims of the people who make us depend on them. When morality and spirituality are lost we speak rudely, we are always pointing to others as the cause of our ills and creating problems for them. It is there where we have to act responsibly, we will be strong as a rock for promotion.
We must know, so as not to be depressed by ignorance, that human life never ceases and the meaning of life also includes suffering and agony, deprivation and death. In war warned no soldier dies.
There are emotional conflicts of feeling inadequate and marginalized, repressed, isolated, undervalued; in these cases we can speak of low self-esteem, to overcome these emotional conflicts it is convenient to look for defense mechanisms to value ourselves, not better but completely, to get out of isolation, to get rid of repression, to leave marginality and feel adapted to the society where we live.
Just as depression manifests itself more and more as a social disease, we must turn to that same society in search of a mechanism of help to get out of these evils, there are usually people around us to whom we can entrust our difficulties, this will serve as a therapy and we will receive advice that will help us to raise our self-esteem.
Not all of us are capable of curing ourselves, there are people who are like lemon, they dry themselves inwards, for which it is necessary to communicate and speak in order to remain calm and free of conscience.
If we decide to reflect, meditate, make a list of our difficulties or successes, return to our origins, or anything else that occurs to us, we will have taken a step towards increasing the appreciation and consideration that we ourselves have.
We should never fall into despair, it is important to maintain the hope that we can get ahead and not rest or fall into the void, because hitting bottom is very serious and we have to make a lot of effort to avoid it. If we really know ourselves, with our strengths and weaknesses, we will know what we are capable of and we will maintain trust and credibility in our person. Accepting ourselves as we are and not putting on more height than we have, is a great step to raise self-esteem.
Search for happiness itself
Do you remember what we said when we talked about fundamental purposes in life and pointed to something specific about happiness? Remember what Mafalda asked his mom? The perplexity of the girl’s mother was that she could not deny that the door to happiness was opened to her, even though she had told him not to open the door to anyone.
Well, if happiness arrives, we must open the door immediately, but if it does not arrive it is necessary to look for it as indicated in the title of this chapter. How and where can we look for happiness? In the first place, happiness is something internal, we can not look for it in the corners of the house, or under the carpets, beds, or in the kitchen or the patio, or anywhere, but in the innermost part of us.
Now as to how we are going to look for it, there are as many methods as there are people, here we point out some ways or ways to look for it and find it. Happiness is a relatively stable welfare state, it represents the satisfaction of our life and a deep and intense joy that we wish to continue.
The idea of wealth swarms in millions of people as the search and achievement of happiness, and practice thousands of things to become rich, sacrificing in many cases their own person, their family, the community and even the Nation, to find wealth and for satisfaction and commitment to money, but the rich also get sick and die. It is not a crime to have money if you have been able to do it honestly, but it is not convenient to place the hopes of achieving happiness only in money.
When we act with enthusiasm, optimism, understanding, with the necessary approval, telling the truth, being sincere, practicing forgiveness, when we are cheerful and have patience and tolerance, when we have faith, hope and charity, the moment we learn from the mistakes and rectify them, if we are humble and we even notice the arrogance of other people, we can say that we are acting well and that we are happy.
Enthusiasm is the exaltation and ardor of the spirit for something that admires or captivates it, if that thing that admires or captivates us is life and we put exaltation and fieryness, we will be bringing all the positivism of the world to our mind to carry out the activity that we responsibly have to do. The action or activity is presented without negativity, negligence, incompetence, breach of rules or imprudence, therefore the exaltation becomes great achievements, because we are executing harmoniously with the laws of nature.
If we add to the exaltation and fieryness the greatest possible perfection and judge and see things in their most favorable aspect, we will also act with optimism. When will we be acting with due understanding? When we analyze the problems, let’s face alternatives, variables and solutions, when we talk to people and accept what they say without reproaching them, when we see things and compare them with the sun, the moon and the stars, when in the minimum arena we see the creation of God and we are noble with the animals and plants, when we open the mind to the understanding, we will act with understanding.
If we act understandably, but also we approve what we do in the deepest recesses of our conscience, because we believe that we are doing well, not to harm ourselves or anyone else, we believe it is the right thing to do with diligence and morality, If we do not doubt, we do not hesitate but we want to go on, we will act with the proper approval and not with the reproach of evil and deception. When we also tell the truth it does not matter that we are learning or that we are climbing the scale of values.
Many of the countries have achieved this with non-specialized people whom they have received in their midst, but to those who have asked as the beginning of their reception, do you know how to tell the truth? The rest does not matter, if he says the truth is credible, if he says the truth is sincere and if he tells the truth he is not evil or impious.
We have already said and explained that ignorance, error, doubt, opinion and probability do not exactly lead to the truth, what leads us to the truth is certainty, doing things well, saying things that are in accordance with vision and mind, not to distort or hinder the activities of life.
Remember the above, which is indicated by the Scriptures: “The truth will set us free.” Forgiveness has also been explained and we must repeat that it is not enough to forgive seven times, or four hundred and ninety times, but to always forgive, seventy times seven was indicated in the Gospels, if we place one seven next to another, and another and another, until completing seventy times seven, that in mathematical language is a multiplication every time for seven, that in mathematical language it is a multiplication every time for seven, what it gives is a number that does not fit anywhere and rises to infinity. That is the forgiveness and the times that we have to forgive.
Glad we have to be always from morning to night, and if we dream that our dreams are happy even though we can not control them, joy is evident in the face as well as sadness. When conditions are good we must be happy, it is logical, but when conditions are bad we must be happy, it is also logical, within the logic of acceptance and approval.
Life contains suffering, agony and deprivation, all are part of the vital currency, when we have patience we are at the door of understanding, because without patience and without tolerance life would be hell, or rather, it is a hell for lack of them. Crime increases due to incomprehension, impatience and intolerance. Violence is contrary to patience and what is acquired or done with violence is contrary to tolerance.
When we have faith as a mustard seed, hope for believing that we are going to achieve what we long for and practice charity by giving poor peace, comfort, relief and bread, we have to achieve happiness, not partially but completely. Never forget that to err is human and rectify is wise.
If we learn from mistakes and rectify them we are opening the door of happiness, especially when we practice humility, like the sweet Jesus of Nazareth, we are before the open door of happiness, which leads directly to the higher state of our inner being and The Kingdom of Heaven.